Day 7

I haven't been able to write anything because of my school schedule and my internet was unexpectadley down for two days. Luckily, no nightly outstanding symptoms appeared and no new additions to my food & body log within the past few days. Just the norm. (Luckily...)

Today I had to teach 2nd graders how a community works. It was a full school day session comprised of 5 separate main points/lessons. I was a little nervous at first. Kids are always a handful. You never know what to expect when it comes to little ones. They never cease to surprise me. I'm glad I had a partner there to help control the flow of things. The kids were pretty interactive and seemed to throughly enjoy what we were teaching them. Everything was fluid and they were so amazingly adorable. Our school was given this opportunity through a program called Junior Achievement. I had a good idea of how to handle them because I worked with a youth tennis camp over the summer. It definitely beat AP US History and Physics....

I've had this lost feeling for awhile, like I'm floating in a sea of nothing. I'm just tired of the monotony of going to school every day, listening to imitations of insipid convos, and acting as if it's all interesting to me. It's gotten to the point where I'm so used to putting on this facade that when I actually meet someone in school that I like I'm so stunned that I don't even know what to say. I'm hidden and it has been the death of a great amount of my out-of-school relationships. Outside of school, with authentic friends, I'm free to be who I am and I take full advantage of that. As soon as I step inside those huge welded doors, I confine my true self and someone else emerges. That someone else isn't a horrible person or anything, it just isn't me. I only let out tidbits of who I really am to the golden few I've met. What's wrong with me...

Ugh, maybe it's just me. I need to branch out and just express myself. Release those oppressive shackles and run around emotionally naked, without that huge mental barrier I've built over the years.

Screw it, I'll be me for a change. ;)

Food & Body Log Time:

12:35 AM -2 vanilla creme cookies
- One slice of pizza

3:30 PM - Cup of french vanilla coffee with skim milk

4:00 PM - Starburst Gummi...thingies.

6:50 PM - Lasagna

Miscellaneous Stuff Time:

I'm super tired. After the JA thing I walked around with a friend. My feet are dead.

Flats are evil.



Took a pocket knife from a little kid on the bus today.


My buddy Navraj kept winning the lottery.




Hmm...what should I write.

I feel broadway deprived. Hope I can go and see something with Jason or Alex.

I have to make a phone call tonight explaining why things sometimes naturally have to end...it's going to be tough.